Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Minnesota (952)

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....

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  (847): he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad? (952): You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him.... http://tfl.nu/ht91
  Replies (37) Good night (1685) Bad night (7508)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  True Life: I hate vaginal excretions

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  (952): True Life: I hate vaginal excretions http://tfl.nu/vhm9
  Replies (66) Good night (590) Bad night (6973) Order T-Shirt
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.

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  (952): Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages. http://tfl.nu/1djk
  Replies (27) Good night (927) Bad night (6798) Order T-Shirt
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I told you not to have sex with her on my futon

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I didnt dude, i swear!

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon

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  (952): I told you not to have sex with her on my futon (612): I didnt dude, i swear! (952): either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon http://tfl.nu/i90q
  Replies (19) Good night (2304) Bad night (6099)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.

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  (952): my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck. http://tfl.nu/zv2o
  Replies (17) Good night (1172) Bad night (3965) Order T-Shirt
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.

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  (952): Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage. http://tfl.nu/guje
  Replies (15) Good night (719) Bad night (3865) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  gross she's a slut

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  yea she doesn't shave either

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  (612): dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear (952): gross she's a slut (612): yea she doesn't shave either http://tfl.nu/93ck
  Replies (30) Good night (491) Bad night (3709)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.

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  (952): Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home. http://tfl.nu/0k8h
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air

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  (952): You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air http://tfl.nu/002i
  Replies (6) Good night (1044) Bad night (3674) Order T-Shirt
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.

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  (952): Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you. http://tfl.nu/1zuw
  Replies (13) Good night (1031) Bad night (3672) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?

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  (612): he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper (952): Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it? http://tfl.nu/ydx5
  Replies (8) Good night (541) Bad night (3515)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.

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  (952): I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband. http://tfl.nu/celm
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear

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  (952): You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear http://tfl.nu/fvq9
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.

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  (952): I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing. http://tfl.nu/jvox
  Replies (24) Good night (1356) Bad night (3218) Order T-Shirt
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.

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  (952): True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you. http://tfl.nu/3inq
  Replies (35) Good night (1176) Bad night (3050) Order T-Shirt