The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE