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Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
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