Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Pennsylvania (610)

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  YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS

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  (610): YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS http://tfl.nu/d44z
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  I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol

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  (610): I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol http://tfl.nu/5mb9
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  Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry

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  (610): Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry http://tfl.nu/g7mi
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  I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.

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  (610): I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four. http://tfl.nu/hflm
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  I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage

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  (610): I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage http://tfl.nu/3lzu
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  Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen

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  (610): Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen http://tfl.nu/wlxj
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  The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar

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  Challenge accepted

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  (610): The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar (614): Challenge accepted http://tfl.nu/nyy2
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  I just want to like rub my face on his abs

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  I need help

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  (610): I just want to like rub my face on his abs (610): I need help http://tfl.nu/fsti
  Replies (2) Good night (766) Bad night (196)
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  IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION

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  (610): IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION http://tfl.nu/utlo
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  I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.

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  (610): I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka. http://tfl.nu/ytpq
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  I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom

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  (610): I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom http://tfl.nu/d66w
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  I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right

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  (610): I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right http://tfl.nu/fw6i
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  Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means

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  (610): Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means http://tfl.nu/2dw5
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  spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.

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  (610): spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN. http://tfl.nu/4bnj
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  BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON

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  (610): BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON http://tfl.nu/ic7e
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