I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
And then the night went full on bisexual.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
