I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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