I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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