We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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