put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Randomize
