I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.