she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
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oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
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Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time