she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom