you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night