He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
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It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
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I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits