Texts From Last Night

Last Night in California (619)

Sort By: Date / Good Night / Bad Night

• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it http://tfl.nu/a0r3
  Replies (1) Good night (930) Bad night (237) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands http://tfl.nu/vlc3
  Replies (4) Good night (1341) Bad night (316) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear. http://tfl.nu/20ls
  Replies (8) Good night (828) Bad night (310) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard. http://tfl.nu/ktvr
  Replies (17) Good night (1293) Bad night (378) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper http://tfl.nu/29cl
  Replies (25) Good night (575) Bad night (732) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch. http://tfl.nu/4axa
  Replies (6) Good night (2964) Bad night (425)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this. http://tfl.nu/nvhn
  Replies (14) Good night (1727) Bad night (388)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer. http://tfl.nu/kgnu
  Replies (23) Good night (1792) Bad night (475) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now. http://tfl.nu/s7lw
  Replies (6) Good night (782) Bad night (573) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll. http://tfl.nu/87wg
  Replies (4) Good night (790) Bad night (949) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating. http://tfl.nu/k9pn
  Replies (9) Good night (693) Bad night (2145) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine. http://tfl.nu/2kaz
  Replies (5) Good night (1271) Bad night (375) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it http://tfl.nu/st9u
  Replies (5) Good night (964) Bad night (416) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions. http://tfl.nu/77kt
  Replies (2) Good night (1290) Bad night (329) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn" http://tfl.nu/h75w
  Replies (5) Good night (1261) Bad night (382) Order T-Shirt