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'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
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