When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.