I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.