dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.