just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top