Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way