ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
20 People Who Caught Their Significant Others Cheating and Hand Over Some Major Karma
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
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I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again