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I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
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