I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like