This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.