tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS