you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
We are two peas in an std pod
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural