Last Night in Illinois (630)

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.

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