He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.