before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
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The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
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Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
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