You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.