Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Go fuck yourself
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position