You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night