If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question