The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I pour the whiskey from now on
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.