Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (336)

Last Night in North Carolina (336)

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You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.

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(336): You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens. http://tfl.nu/3z5p

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Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me

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(336): Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me http://tfl.nu/v2u1

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I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass

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(336): I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass http://tfl.nu/ok5m

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I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.

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(336): I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it. http://tfl.nu/1f7k

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that was THE gayest party i've ever been to

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To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.

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(336): that was THE gayest party i've ever been to (1-336): To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting. http://tfl.nu/c4g2

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You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.

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Haha hell yea

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Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.

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(980): You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday. (336): Haha hell yea (980): Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday. http://tfl.nu/pa5o

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I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.

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(336): I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman. http://tfl.nu/r3qg

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I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..

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(336): I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain.. http://tfl.nu/5env

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I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"

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(336): I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body" http://tfl.nu/dnkv

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I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown

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Oh my god

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(336): I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown (336): Oh my god http://tfl.nu/ejg0

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It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?

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(336): It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo? http://tfl.nu/6rh5

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I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex

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(336): I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex http://tfl.nu/yoqe

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Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM

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(336): Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM http://tfl.nu/7din

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He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.

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(336): He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it. http://tfl.nu/p4ei

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We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door

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(336): We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door http://tfl.nu/uhw2

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Last Night in North Carolina (336)

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