How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.