Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Michigan (248)

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  thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.

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  (248): thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer. http://tfl.nu/nnju
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  it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world

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  i told you not to try chat roulette

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  (248): it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world (1-248): i told you not to try chat roulette http://tfl.nu/80bv
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  am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????

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  (248): am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock???? http://tfl.nu/dfne
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  I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet

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  (248): I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet http://tfl.nu/xsvu
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  I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...

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  (248): I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby... http://tfl.nu/0zej
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  my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'

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  (248): my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you' http://tfl.nu/ael6
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  So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.

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  (248): So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection. http://tfl.nu/x1ov
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  I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time

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  (248): I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time http://tfl.nu/uesv
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  Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...

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  (248): Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed... http://tfl.nu/xlpz
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  dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call

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  (248): dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call http://tfl.nu/9cld
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  Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.

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  (248): Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone. http://tfl.nu/k3in
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  @ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu

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  (248): @ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu <3 (1-248): please stop breathing. http://tfl.nu/7uu5
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  he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.

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  (248): he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg. http://tfl.nu/hgt4
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  The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again

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  (248): The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again http://tfl.nu/1sak
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  first off, his name is dougie. strike one.

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  (248): first off, his name is dougie. strike one. http://tfl.nu/yrg3
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