a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.