The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.