its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash