what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..