Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.