whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win