Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
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I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.