also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ