No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
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My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
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HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"