The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL