it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome