Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Arizona (480)

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  naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor

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  (480): naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor http://tfl.nu/fgya
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  You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone

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  (480): You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone http://tfl.nu/wd7b
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  This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi

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  (480): This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi http://tfl.nu/fvjc
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  I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!

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  (480): I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE! http://tfl.nu/0hwt
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  Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?

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  (480): Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick? http://tfl.nu/0q5p
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  Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?

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  (480): Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people? http://tfl.nu/e8xq
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  halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...

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  exactly, that's why i want something interesting

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  slutty neuroscientist?

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  (512): halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc... (480): exactly, that's why i want something interesting (512): slutty neuroscientist? http://tfl.nu/zg01
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  just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.

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  i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.

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  k i'll be over in 5.

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  (480): just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds. (1-480): i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice. (480): k i'll be over in 5. http://tfl.nu/rkxl
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  I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground

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  (480): I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground http://tfl.nu/mit9
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  Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it

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  (480): Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it http://tfl.nu/4lbe
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  I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."

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  SHUT IT DOWN.

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  (480): I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it." (1-480): SHUT IT DOWN. http://tfl.nu/mpc8
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  You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.

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  (480): You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker. http://tfl.nu/8odk
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  I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning

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  (480): I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning http://tfl.nu/5v1w
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  so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.

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  (480): so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out. http://tfl.nu/rr3m
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  With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.

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  (480): With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality. http://tfl.nu/1pex
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