i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.