it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Did we literally take a cab across the street
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We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it